Mom's Tree House

I just finished a new book due to be released in May, called The Available Parent: Radical Optimism for Raising Teens and Tweens, written by Dr. John Duffy. Basically, this book is a how-to-manual in understanding, communicating and parenting their child as they enter the most difficult time of their years, that being their adolescence.

In “The Available Parent” Dr. John Duffy addresses many issues parents face each day as their children grow, entering teenage-hood. Dr. Duffy emphasises that as parents, roles have to be redefined, in where more radical and creative approaches have to be undertaken in order to raise a teen more effectively.

First, I have to say that enjoyed this book simply due to the tone it was written. I am not big on parenting books, not because I believe I’m a perfect parent but, because I think they are often written to theoretically and too boring. Yet, in this book, Dr. Duffy provides examples of what may be already happening in your home and then challenging the reader to try some exercises to see how it may change the situation. The book also allows you to see the teenager’s perspective as they voice their own opinions in the book. So, I liked the fact that I was able to see a particular situation, (like cleaning a room) from both sides, one from the parent and one from the child.

I also enjoyed the format of the book, making it a simple read and guide, just in case you want reference one or two particular concerns. The book is broken into three parts which include Your Teenager’s Wild World, What Never Works and What Always Works with sub-categories under each part. Each part or category gives you a variety of ideas of helping your child with developing their self-esteem, instilling positive values  and self-worth, as well as creating behavior contracts between parent and child that actually work by making the child feel they have an equal part in the decision making process that affects them. i wished I could have thought of something like this when I raising y daughter when she was a teen, she absolutely gave me hell. Thank goodness she transitioned well, but as a parent, I was also suffering.

Now, my approach will be a little different, as I think of Franco when one day he will be entering these troubling years. The available parent proves that to be an effective parent of a teenager, you have to be willing to open  discussions, offering advice and problem-solving, but not insisting on it. Allowing mistakes without judgments, setting limits, never lectures and does not control. The available parent is self-aware, keeping emotions in check when dealing with their teen. We have a tendency today to over-parent, micro-manage, and under-appreciate our adolescents. The Available Parent shows you how to accept and love your teenager unconditionally while building a foundation for the relationship to work. If you have a teenager at home, then you need to get this book. Really, you NEED TO GET THIS BOOK. I have been there and it is not easy, in fact, when you baby becomes a teenager, it is down right scary. Now, after reading this book, I am no longer dreading it.

About The Author

Dr. John Duffy, author of The Available Parent: Radical Optimism for Raising Teens and Tweens, is a highly sought-after clinicalpsychologist, certified life coach, parenting expert, and proud parent. He has been working with teens, tweens, and their families for more than fifteen years. He has provided the critical intervention and support needed to help hundreds of families find their footing.

He has served as a contributing parent expert for a number of media outlets. These include AOL Health, AOL Parent Dish, Notre Dame magazine, Root & Sprout, bettyconfidential.com, makeitbetter.net, examiner.com, theteendoc.com, Chicago Parent, sheknows.com, Psych Central, Current Health Teens, The Oakland Tribune, and Working Mother Magazine. He has also served as a parenting and relationship expert on a number of radio programs, including the nationally-syndicated Mr. Dadprogram with best-selling author Armin Brott, and The Lite Show on WNTD in Chicago. Dr. Duffy has also contributed to a number of books, including Living Life as a Thank You(Viva Editions) by Mary Beth Sammons and Nina Lesowitz.

For more information, view John Duffy’s Web site.

 Disclosure: I received a  copy of this book from FSB Media in exchange for my review.   No other compensation was received.  All opinions are 100% my own and may differ from others.